Everybody seems to agree that love is the most precious gift of life, and that 'if you haven’t loved, you haven’t lived'; and that 'it's better to have loved and lost, than not to have loved at all'. And yet, so many people are masters at sabotaging love as soon as they get close to it, without even knowing what they are doing. Almost as if a separate self is taking over, they’ll run away with all their might. And they´ll run even faster and work even harder to be better in all the other areas of their life, in an unconscious attempt to make up for what they are missing. But with suppression and disconnection they will only pile up more pressure and more darkness. And history repeats itself.
Love, without awareness to care for love, will vanish very soon and leave you empty handed.
Whether it’s the ego at work, or the past standing in the way, the bottom line is, that if you are not willing to dig deep and make a change, love will not survive you, your ego or your past. Because love does not thrive in the dark. Love, without awareness to care for love, will vanish very soon and leave you empty handed.
You must not run, you must choose to confront and understand. If you do, you will find out that it is not who you are, but it’s a strategy you learned to cope with unrelated pain and distress.
The very moment that the happiness of another person becomes essential to our own, that moment you’ll know you have found love.
LOVE'S BAD ADVISORS
Hello my name is EGO
The ego is all about survival and is always seeking power and control. It can kick in very fast when we think our safety is in danger. Even in a love relationship, if you have fears, the ego will take the upper hand and cause the relationship to become a struggle and eventually go down the drain.
Love, real love, is not, and can not be a function of the ego, nor can it come from a place of fear. Fear puts restraints, while love is an enlarging experience which can only come from a place of grace.
Hello my Name is PAST
When it comes to love and relationships, what you bring to the table has a lot to do with your past. The darkness you fight against is not something specific to you – it is in part the product of your particular life experiences. You can gain an enormous amount of ground by looking at your most engrained influences.
Once you recognize them and are willing to challenge you oldest defense, you will no longer act on instinctive adaptations. You will trust instead of fearing, tear down your walls instead of building higher ones, you will find pleasure in giving instead of experiencing it like an obligation to fulfil.
And the very moment that the happiness of another person becomes essential to our own, that moment you’ll know you have found love.